It’s been awhile since I sat down and wrote something personal. I used to try on the old blogspot to touch base at least once a week but I’ve been a slacker since the jump to WordPress. Which, by the way, I’m warming up to steadily more and more. I know it’s a little different but the more I’m learning, the more I’m thinking this was the right decision. I hope it’s been okay for everyone so far: is it easy to read on your computer AND your cell? Are the links to Facebook working properly/easily? Do you like the layout? I am open to any and ALL feedback, y’all. This may be my venting source but I’m sharing it with each and every one of you. I want you guys to be just as comfortable here as I am.
My Valentine’s Day has consisted of:
- Barnes and Noble 2 for $20 select teen book sale (Thanks, tax refund!)
- Ventured out for kibble for the mutt because he’s Starving. To. Death.
- Carissa got me chocolate covered strawberries yesterday and I managed to have the willpower to save ONE that I could enjoy today with my coffee. (Thanks, CP!)
- Swept my sidewalk & cleaned off my car – how weird was that snow we got? Reminded me of Styrofoam or something. Really neat.
- Now, on the couch, with a candle burning (Black Tie from Bath & Body — holy cow, does it smell good!) and needing some creative release.
I have fallen behind on my reading challenge but right now I’m currently devouring Queen of Shadows by Sarah J. Maas then onto Me Before You by Jojo Moyes. I’m a little scared to finish QoS just because the next installment isn’t out until September – and I truly believe in book hangovers, okay? I even believe they’re worse than tequila hangovers. I’m also a little scared to start Me Before You because it’s going to be a total bawl-fest according to all the reviews and the recommendations I’ve got.
Look, if you haven’t read a book that’s made you cry – make it a personal goal to find one. I think there is something so dang genuinely beautiful about words breaking you down on your basest level. Having to sit it down for a few seconds to catch your breath. Noticing you’re gripping it with white knuckles. The twist in your gut when a character on a page rips your bleeding heart out and stomps all over it. Cliff hangers that make you stare blankly at the opposite wall as you close the book and feel your soul splinter into a million tiny pieces.
(Good Valentine’s Day talk, huh? Ha!)
On another note – I joined paperbackswap.com last week. Anyone else on this site? So far, I’m a little lack-lustered but I AM getting rid of some of my “Literary Bullshit” stack. (Yes, I actually have a box in my hallway labeled LITERARY BULLSHIT in Sharpie where I angrily toss books I think would be better off used as wood stove kindling.)
Getting to the heart of this post – let me just go on and write what I came here to say:
I am single. Not happily so but not unhappily so, either. Does that make sense? I truly enjoy being alone (I’m one of those people) yet miss having someone to go get tacos with at 2 a.m. sometimes, too. Simply put, I don’t hate Valentine’s Day and I don’t hate on the couples who get to enjoy this day as a unit. It’s just not something I’ve every personally gotten to experience in a positive light with a significant other. My point is, I think Valentine’s Day is more about celebrating what bring you happiness and what you love more than anything in the world. Yes, the people but also the experiences and feelings you’ve had the joy to accumulate as a human being.
You know what I’ve got?
A. A beautiful, supportive, HILARIOUS family who never shoves me down. Who backs me in all my ventures. Who tells me when I’m being a little selfish. Who builds me up when I’m a mess. I ENJOY my family – the random talks, the breakdowns, the roadtrips, the ruthless card games, and the late nights. They are my unit. They are the people I can turn to and count on every single minute of every single day. I celebrate them.
B. A dog who still loves me after experiencing: my bad morning breath, my hot temper, my badly performed bathroom karaoke, my fear of birds, and my endless hours of ignoring him to read books. I hear people say “I’m not much of a dog person” and there’s a part of me that hurts for them – to not experience the loyalty and connection of a devoted canine. Hagan beats any boyfriend I’ve ever had because he makes me better. Dogs have bigger hearts than people. I celebrate him.
C. I have food in my fridge, running water, heat, and clothes piling up in laundry baskets. It may be beat up and high mileage but I have a car that gets me from Point A to Point B. I have a job. I celebrate the fact I have (not only a life) but one I can live comfortably & in a home I take for granted too often.
D. I have books and paint and wood stain and power tools and coloring pencils. I celebrate the fact I can express myself and do so in a country where it’s my RIGHT.
E. I celebrate those who have died and are currently fighting to protect that very RIGHT.
I have friends I can call when I’m a bottle of wine deep and just need to hear someone’s voice on the line. I have friends I can hug in public because they know I crave affection. I have friends who tell me they love me even though I probably don’t deserve it.
I mean, how lucky am I?
–When I have all of that, do teddy bears and a dozen roses really compare?
Happy Valentine’s Day, y’all — to you and your families. On this cold, winter day I hope you’re doing something you love or spending time with someone you love or both.
Thanks for checking in,